The Land Lubber’s Challenge-Chapter 3


This is the third chapter in my Land Lubber’s Challenge, put forth by the girls over at The Sims 3 Musketeers.  Reading the first two chapters in this story is recommended so that this one makes sense.  The first chapter includes information regarding the challenge as well as the web address of the Sims 3 Musketeers if you are interested in participating yourself!  Both chapters can be found on this blog under “The Land Lubber’s Challenge”.  In this chapter, Gwen works toward her LTW of maxing her fitness and logic skills.  So then, on with the story…


MONDAY (week 3)–Gwennny…oh, Gwennny…Wake up little Gwenny.  I have some good news for you today…Now, I know you were a little disapointed last night at having to move back outside, but I have an exciting day planned for you to make up for it that involves shopping!  We’re going on a little trip downtown this morning so jump up out of bed and let’s get a move on it!


While you were sleeping, I took the liberty of searching around town to find you a servicable dresser so that we could get you a new change of clothes, as I’ve been informed that you smell to high heaven.  Since purchasing you a new wardrobe is out of the question, I have located a venerable treasure trove of new items for you here at the local gym.  Yes…the, er, ‘gift shop’ is right back this way…follow me.


Psssst!  Gwen!  Over here…in the women’s locker room…Come in quick and shut the door while no one’s looking!  What?  It’s fine…trust me!  Your new wardrobe is conveniently located in that dresser over there…    


You’re going to need to give that top drawer there a stiff pull…It sticks something terrible.  Really lean in and put your back into it and yank for all you’re worth…


Whoops!  I guess it wasn’t as stiff as I thought it was…sorry ’bout that…What?  No, I’m not laughing at you…


*wipes tears from eyes* Ahhh…now, where were we again?  Oh, yes…a new wardrobe for you…Well, since the patrons of this gym have so conviently left their changes of clothing in the dresser here, you can make the most of this situation and rifle through their unmentionables to find something new for yourself…*snort*  No, it’s not like stealing…more like ‘borrowing for an extended period of time’.  I bet the owners won’t even notice.


What do you mean, “the pickings are slim”?  I don’t care if you, “don’t do blue”!  There’s got to be something decent in there somewhere.  There are at least five or six women here right now working out and one of them should have something good in there…Just pick something and try it on!


Look…I’ll even give you some privacy if it makes you feel better.  I’ll hang outside the door by the pool here and wait for you to model your new selection.  Be quick about it, though…I don’t want to be here all day.  I’ve got other things planned for you and the longer I sit here, the worse they become.


OK…hmmmm…well, I guess I probably should have been more specific in what I was looking for.  Jailbait nightwalker might be good for your night job, but I was leaning toward something, say, a little bit more fishing-oriented.  Try again, Powder Puff…


Alright, just because you’re thinking about fishing while you’re trying these things on, doesn’t mean that they’ll work for fishing.  Oh, I see…well, that does change things doesn’t it?  *sigh*  Alright, let me be even more specific…fishing for FISH, not MEN…Does that paint a clearer picture for you Tinkerbell?  Try again…


Wha??  How is that even closer to being a good fishing outfit?!  Oh, yes…I can see how you might think that…fish do like shiny things…*sigh*  I’m begining to wonder if the whole “genius” trait is a bit trumped up…


Better!  Much better!  See?  I told you there was something that would work in there for you.  Shorts, tennis shoes, and a nice nautical shirt…A perfect choice for fishing!  Find one more outfit that will work and then we can be done.  Oh, stop whining…most girls actually LIKE stealing…I mean, shopping.  You’d better make it quick too…I don’t like the way that chubby blond girl over there is staring at my Twinkie.  


Another good choice!  Alright, well now you have three servicable outfits that will work well for climbing hills and crawling through bushes.  What?  *tsk* No one’s going to recognize their stolen outfits…Just make sure not to wear them around the gym, is all.  Or around town.  Now, I want you to change into your workout outfit ’cause we got some workin’ out to do!  We’re going to get my little Gwenny in shape!


*Hrump*  Gwen, you worry about the strangest things…As if anyone is going to come into the locker room and steal your old outfit…Who would do something like that?  Oh, yes…well, I guess you have a point…Well, let’s not worry about that right now…Right now, we’ve got to focus on getting you in shape so that you can reach your LTW.  Let’s see what machines are available to help you meet your fitness needs…


Crap.  They’re all taken.  What kind of self-respecting gym of any caliber and worth has only four flipping machines in their facilities?  I’d have half a mind to complain to the management if we hadn’t just got done pilfering those new outfits from the locker room for you. 


Ah, well…Now listen up while I teach you a little trick I learned long, long ago when your ancestors were busy vacationing in Sims 2 land and they needed a free meal…


Alright…See that stout woman over there on that workout bench huffing and puffing away?  You’re going to go over and tap her on the shoulder like you would like to have a conversation with her…


…Then when she stands up and climbs off of the machine to talk to you…


…you jump on the recently vacated machine, leaving her alone to ponder why she fell for the ol’ tap and ditch trick.  Ha!  Imbecile!  What?  No, that’s not rude.  Rude, my dear Gwenny, is sweating all over the machines and then not wiping it off before moving on.  Rude, is spending six hours on one machine when there are only four in the room while others wait and eventually have to resort to making rude hand gestures to get you off.  Rude, is pawning through other people’s things that they’ve left in the locker room…That’s rude!  Just consider this to be teaching her a lesson on manners…


OK…Now, that we’ve got you a machine, it’s time to really work it, Gwen!  I want you to give it your all…


OK…Let’s just consider that a trial run…Just take a breather and let’s have another go…Push for all your worth…


Gwen, I’m becoming slightly concerned at this point, that I may have made a mistake in choosing the LTW of maxing the Logic and Body skill for you.  I’m begining to feel the little tickles of fear deep down inside that we may have a dire situation on our hands here.  OK…let’s just stay calm…breathe…maybe you just have weak upper body muscles.  Let’s try some leg work, shall we?


Well, I can officially say that those little tickles of fear have fully grown into ham sized fists of doom that are relentlessly pounding my heart into little bits at this point.   


*sigh*  We’re going to have to spend more time on this than I had first anticipated.  Well, we haven’t got anything else to do now, do we?…Except of course, make a crap pile of money…build a house…find a man…have a kid…you know.  Nothing too time consuming.  Well, I think we’ve both had enough disapointment for one day.  Let’s head down to the park and see how we can end this whiz banger of a day…


Well, well, well now!  Here’s an interesting prospect for us.  Perched on the edge of the fountain, just waiting for some lovely lady to stroll up and ask his name…We may just be able to save this day yet!


He looks like a friendly sort of chap, doesn’t he Gwen?  Not like the usual gaggle of losers that you pick out…but then again, I guess I picked him, which is why.


Say ‘hello’ to him and try not to scare him off like you did ol’ Stiles.  Look deep into his eyes and ask him important questions like…  


…”How much money do you have?”…Wha?!?  No!  No!  Gwen, what are you doing?!  Quick, ask him something non-threatening before he runs off like all the others!


Good!  Colors are good and non-threatening!  He likes green…That’s promising!  Green is the color of grass and trees…maybe he likes the outdoors, which would be a good trait in a prospective mate for you!


He likes sleeping under the stars?  No way!  Are you feeding this stuff to him, Gwen?  There’s no way this guy could be any more perfect for you!


OK, he just got more perfect!  Look at that Gwen!  He’s an angler, just like you!  You could both spend your days collecting, fishing, sleeping under the stars…until I get your house finished that is.  Wow, I’m glad we stopped by the park today on our way home.  I’m begining to feel a little less constricted through the ol’ airways right about now.  Exchange numbers and we’ll pick this conversation up later on…like when we have a house to impress him with.


TUESDAY (week 3)–OK, Gwen…We’re gonna try this again.  We’re back at the gym, ready to give it another go, but this time I think we’ll attack this beast from a different angle.  Let’s try some cardiovascular work today, instead of the weights.  It shouldn’t be too tough, right?


I mean, your heart should be in pretty good condition with all of that running around town everywhere and collecting that you do.  The only way that wouldn’t be the case, would be if you were cheating behind my back and taking taxis everywhere instead of running.  Why are you grinning like that? *narrows eyes*


Oh, stop complaining…Look, I’ll even work out with you…How does that sound?  We’ll be in this together.  Just like ol’ pals, eh?  So let’s turn the music way up and start jumping…


…dang it!  I just dropped my Ding Dong on the floor and the dog ate it!  Great!  That was the last one in the box, too.  You’re going to have to go on without me, Gwen, while I observe a moment of silence.  Carry on…


SATURDAY (week 3)–Instead of heading to the gym today, Gwen, I thought we could go for a jog instead.  You haven’t gotten a chance to do very much collecting this week since we’ve been so focused on whipping your butt into shape.  I thought we could jog up to a lake and do a little fishing.


What?  Yes, it is far…I purposely chose the lake all the way on the other side of Sunset Valley to give you a chance to workout while we went collecting.  You can’t quit now…We’re only half way there!


Yes, the rest of the way is uphill.  So what?  You can do it!  You just need to focus on the goal…


What?  You miss the gym?  Well, ummm, while I enjoyed our time spent at the gym as much as you did, I think we should possbily avoid that place for, oh say, the next few months or so…


…you know…to give the patrons who lodged complaints with the management regarding their stolen clothing items a chance to settle back down, put out their torches, get rid of their pitchforks, and forget about that little misunderstanding…


There’s no sense in tempting fate, now is there Gwen?  What’s that?  Your legs feel wobbly and you don’t think you can run the rest of the way?


This is going to be the begining of a looong day for both of us, isn’t it Gwen?


Alright, Drama Queen…I get the picture…we’ve been fishing at this lake all day and you’re starving.  Well, we’re on the other side of Sunset Valley far from home, so you’re going to have to come up with something on your own here.


Hmmm?  Yes, I see the little school girl diligently reading her book behind you with no visible light source.  She may be of assistance to you.  There’s no harm in trying… 


She looks like a nice, helpful little girl.  Let her know how hungry you and how much you would really appreciate her assistance in this matter.


Oh!  She has a nice grilled cheese sandwich wrapped up in her pocket that her mum gave her?…Wonderful!…oh…


…oh, my…but she isn’t going to give it to you?  She does have some juicy worms in her pocket that she would be willing to share with an unprepared, mooching, no good…oh…oh…*cringe*…


…oh my…Well, she told you, didn’t she?  Who would’ve thought that a little girl like that had the vocabulary of a jaded sailor?  She even had some curse words that I’ve never heard before…I’m going to have to write those down…What?  No, no reason…


What?  Oh, come on!  Like it’s my fault I didn’t give you the ‘moocher’ trait so that you would be better at begging…sheesh!  Just finish your meal and get to bed.  Tomorrow’s Sunday and we’ve got to go down to the market and turn in our goods.  I’ve got a bad feeling about that, by the way…


SUNDAY (week 3)–OK…well that went about as planned.  The lesson here is that if you don’t do a lot of collecting throughout the week, you won’t be getting a lot of money either.  1,400 simoleans isn’t going to buy you very much house.  I can already see that you will still be living outside again for another week…Well, let’s go see what this can get us…


Here you are…What?  Why, yes it does look like we were able to do quite a lot, doesn’t it?  Until you go around the corner and see the yawning, cavernous hole that will someday be the inside of your house.  I only made it look like we were able to do a lot by putting up a wall along the front and adding a little bit onto the back.  We’ve still got a lot to do, Princess, and I’ve got a bad feeling about this.  Due to my over ambitious nature, I may have bitten off more than you can chew here.  You’re going to have to kick this collecting thing into overdrive next week to make up for our lack of progress in this area this week…


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